For Ankit - for the good times.....with friends

Another one for you beta with my thoughts. Like i said mamma is senti today :)

This snap brings back memories of your band practise at home. You have always managed to have a group that shares your taste in music. It has always been a treat - a treat you watch you zero in on a song, a treat to hear you practise on your own, a treat you hear you all practise together -behind closed doors - you think sound doesn't travel????? forgot physics???? :) :)  It has also been a treat you hear you guys get frustrated when one of you is out of tune. It was a treat to receive a tring tring from your principal to come and fetch 'The Nameless' band members - Vidur, Swaddy, Kedar, Aditya Manoj and you my beta Ankit . It was a treat to watch you'll decide on your shirt colours, it was a treat to bake the buns for you all. I am blessed because i got the chance to be a part of 'The Nameless' in a small small way! Thank you for the musical treat.


This is the first time that i have seen you so comfortable with girls......and it has been a pleasure to see and to know that. It just means that you do not consider 'us' to be from another planet. It also means that by being with them you are learning to respect them and accept them the way they are. Always remember what  Daddy and Ma  tell you - respect every girl, woman. Make sure that you are not the cause for hurting them. We women can be confusing and hard to understand beta but that's what makes us special!!!




When i wait in the balcony for you to get back home, it is always a 'happy' moment for me. It warms my heart when i see you stroll back with your friends, arm around shoulders, sometimes laughing, sometimes having serious conversations. It warms my heart when i see you'll sit on the culvert between the two buildings - Chitra and Insaaf.











For me, the time you get back home is a cue about how your day at school was- if you're back early it means that you've had a bad day, and the later you're back the happier your day has been!!! Thankfully the former did not happen many times. Thank you for my afternoon aha moments beta!




The Insaaf bus stop has been the most happening hub between two and half past two in the afternoon. It's been a treat to spot you amongst the gang, it's been a treat to watch your antics. It has been a treat to watch you just enjoy!!

















You enjoy wonderful friendships beta and that is a blessing! It has been a privilege knowing your friends. Their bright and chirpy ' hi aunty' have been the highlight of many a day! Treasure your friends, treasure the memories of your time spent with them - they'll always bring a smile to your face when you think of them.

For Ankit........Friends - truly blessings

Friends are truly a blessing - a huge, big blessing in fact! i have been blessed with so many of them. There is something special i share with each of my friends, and together it is one big loop, a loop which makes my life complete in every which way.

Beta, today, when i saw pictures of you  with  your friends, when i saw your expressions, it again dawned on me the importance of friends. Honestly, seeing the pictures has made me sentimental. It's brought home the fact that you have grown. Grown because the friendships you now have with each one of your friends are also special and unique. Like i told you this afternoon, when you grow the relationships you share are because of exactly that - of what you share with each of your friends. It was different when you were younger, friendships meant people you played with, you were partners with in class, you were in the same team with, you were neighbours with. Today, when i hear you talk about your friends, when i see you with them, when i talk to them, it is not because you are playing with them or are put in situations with them, it is because you share so much with them!

You're lucky beta that you have so many many friends, so many good friends. Friends you can reach out to, friends you can play with, friends you can sing with, friends you can share your deepest darkest secrets with, friends you can laugh with, friends you can share your frustrations with, friends you can spend hours with, friends you can draw comfort from.

Beta, you are so very lucky that you have been blessed with friends you have learnt so much from. You have grown so much in the last year and it's because of the strong bonds you have formed, bonds which have helped you realize the strengths of your friends. It is from these strengths of your friends that you have learnt and grown. For this mamma is truly thankful to each one of them.

Above all Ankit, you are truly blessed that your friends have accepted you just the way you are! Cause that's what real friendship is about. It is about accepting the person as a package - strengths and weaknesses together. Each one of us is different. It is impossible that everybody will be exactly how you would want them to be. Can you imagine how boring life would be?!! Then you would need just one friend. It is the synergies of all the different people in our life that makes our friendships so beautiful. This brings mamma to a very important point - accept people the same way as you have been accepted by your friends, accept people the exact same way you would want to be accepted. Always, always remember that beta, no matter how old or grey you are!!

i know you are hurting because we are moving to another city which means parting. However, take heart from the fact that you were blessed to have such wonderful friends in less than a year of being here. Also, you are lucky a few of them are moving to the same city as you. You are even more lucky that you can communicate with them fast and quick - thanks to technology. So like mamma firmly believes in , 'always see the positives, life is truly a blessing then' !

Jhansi

In the year 2013 if I were to tell somebody that I lived there for 6 years, I can almost see the shock on the face! Wonder what the reaction would be if I were to say that I lived there from 1973-79!!! That's eons back - the last century!

However, even now I remember Jhansi with a lot of fondness. I've had some wonderful experiences while there and many many memories which I cherish to date. I'm glad I lived in Jhansi - in the little town that it was.

I've decided to list my memories down - in no particular order as such.

Memory 1
Summers were unbearably hot in Jhansi. The walls of the house spewed heat through the night. The fan assisted the walls in ensuring that the hot air reached every nook and corner. There was no way one could sleep indoors. We did have coolers, but for that you needed electricity through the night!! We had our own exciting way of ensuring we slept sound. Walking past the houses in the colony late in the evening, you would drown in the most intoxicating smell - the smell you smell when water has been sprayed over a hot tarred road and over the hot, parched mud. For me, it is one of the most beautiful smells to date. The road, the lawns and the ground would all be sprayed, watered, long enough for the surface heat to have been won over by the cool water. That done, the cots would be put out, mattresses spread, bedsheets spread, mosquito nets fastened. Post dinner, the families retired for a good nights rest out in the open, with the starry night sky as the roof over your head!!!
Would I have had this 'sleeping under the night sky' experience had I been in a city? I doubt. Would I have felt safe doing so, I doubt.

Memory 2
Summers also meant 'jugnus' or fireflies. Come sunset and you could see thousands of them, with their little lights flickering as if beckoning us to 'catch me if you can'! And, that's exactly what we did! We would run after them, get them between our two palms, put them into a big glass bottle, with a cloth to cover the mouth and watch in wonder how the 'jugnus'  shone. In some time they would stop giving out their light and that was the cue for us to let them free.
Would I have even seen 'jugnus'  if I was in a city? I doubt. Would I have even known of something called 'jugnu' ? I doubt.

Memory 3
There was a huge 'ber' tree in the compound of my house. I had a 'jhoola' which hung from one of its branches. How did we get the 'ber' ? We used the jute ropes of the swing to rope-climb, got onto the tree, plucked whatever the little hands could get, threw them down to our friends who would be holding a sheet to collect them. If the collect wasn't much, we would just lie horizontal on the thick 'swing branch', hold on with one hand and use the other hand to give the nearby branches a good shake, and what do we get - 'ber ka baarish' !!!Not to forget, the friends who held on to the swing to ensure it did not sway while we climbed and slid down the ropes!!! I don't remember how we ate the 'ber', the process of getting them probably appealed to me more!!!
Would I have ever learnt to rope climb had I been in a city? I doubt. Would I have had the luxury of having friends come over to pluck and collect 'bers', I doubt.

Memory 4
This is another 'collecting memory'. What did we collect? We collected 'olas' !!! Suddenly, there would be a downpour of hailstones. Our heads would hurt. Our first observation would be how big the hailstones were. We would run into the verandah of the closest house. Everything would be white - it was like there was snow all around the house. Then came the patient wait - the wait for the hailstones to end. I can still feel the excitement we felt once it stopped. What was the excitement for???? Believe it or not, it was to collect the 'olas' !!!!. We would rush out gather all what we could, all what our frocks could hold, all what our little hands could hold and lay them on the window sill. Each child had one window sill and then it was a wait and watch to see whose hailstones last the longest!
Would I have had the chance to experience such simple pleasures and experiences had I been in a city? I doubt. Would I have had the luxury of collecting 'olas'? I doubt.

Memory 5
Sadar Bazaar was our big outing! Dirty, crowded, teeming with people. I remember hearing the song 'O saathi re, tere bina bhi kya jina' over and over again while eating chole-bhature in a really tiny but famous joint. There was something about the taste, the ambience, the music. It was comfort food. I still associate this food with this particular song. Probably, it was the only joint that had a tape recorder and so the proud owner thought it to be his duty to entertain all with the music. Why do I remember only this song? I don't know. The other taste unique to Jhansi in my memory is that of 'karela-chaat'. It was just that the paapdi was shaped like a karela. I can stilll see and taste the 'dahi' , the 'imli chatni', the 'mirchi powder'.
Would I have enjoyed a crowded market place in a city the way I enjoyed sadar bazaar? I doubt.

I had the good fortune of visiting Jhansi for a couple of days in 2003. I was thrilled with the chance I'd gotten and more so because I was taking my son along. A lot has changed, the roads are broader, the roads cleaner, the shops swankier, hotels to eat in. The 'ber' tree is still there and the 'jhoola' too. I did not find the chola - bhature joint.
One thing hasn't changed - the 'karela-chaat'  at sadar bazaar!!!!! The taste is still the same, it looks still the same! Like in the 70's we had to stand out and eat it from the 'patte ka plate'. My son loved it - had 3 plates. He still remembers it and keeps saying that the taste is still there in his mouth and that he is yet to have something like that!!

I've been truly blessed with the many opportunities to live in so many different places. They've each given me so many beautiful memories to cherish and keep.

Influences

I am what I am because of the many influences I've had in my life - be it the people, the places the experiences, the food. Knowingly or unknowingly, I am a product of these many influences.

One such influence came to mind during breakfast today. While we were at breakfast - the regular eggs, toast, butter/cheese routine, I suddenly had a craving for my special treat to go with my toast. And what could that be? Hot toast topped with cold chunky peanut butter which is further topped with refrigerated whole blueberry/mixed berry/strawberry/wild cherry conserve. That's when my influences came to my mind and I shared it with R.

What could those influences be????

I've been a small town girl, a girl from the small towns of India. We never did have access to any of the fancy foods / labels. In fact I never knew many things existed, until I grew older, moved to cities and yes, the economy opened up (allowing for import). When I was young we never called peanuts 'peanuts', we called them groundnuts. I was exposed to many forms of groundnuts.

• The first, roasted dry in their shell. The shell would brown, turn really crisp. It was then very easy to crack them open just by pressing them between the thumb and the index finger. And, inside would be two warm and crunchy nuts!! It tastes delicious. The only thing you end up having more waste than what you eat!
• The second, shelled groundnuts which would be shallow fried in oil until they were nice and brown. They are then taken off the fire and the magic ingredients added to them - finely chopped onions, finely chopped green chillies, salt and a squeeze of lime. It tastes yummmm!!!
• The third, boiled with turmeric and salt with their shells on. The result - juicy groundnuts!!

When I was 18, I lived with a very good friend of mine in the big Indian metropolis called Bombay (It's now called Mumbai). It was in Gina's house that I was introduced to another form of groundnut, which was 'peanut butter'. Wow! This was something new, and it came in two forms - chunky and creamy. I fell in love with chunky peanut butter! It had so much substance, so much flavour, a very different texture. It wasn't like anything I had eaten before! An influence in my life - chunky peanut butter, courtesy Gina.

I've always liked my toast to be topped with salted table butter on which a layer of mixed fruit jam would be spread. But I never did find anything to go with peanut butter, until many many years later. In fact, I found it almost twenty years after I found peanut butter!!!! 

Amrita didi is a dear friend despite the 20 year age difference. We've spent a lot of time together, shared a lot, poured our heart out, vented out. We did all this over cups of filter coffee at Oxford (a book shop) or over cups of Darjeeling tea at her place. And it was at her place that I had my second breakfast influence (though it wasn't during breakfast time). It was at her place that I first tasted the St. Dalfour range of fruit conserves. I first had them topped on whole grain biscuits. The first bite was like nirvana - luscious, just the right amount of sweet, crunchy with the seeds, wholesome, it was actually biting into fruits! An influence in my life - St. Dalfour fruit conserve, courtesy Amrita didi.